Wine
by Jennyloveskandy
Summary: A new beginning for Sandy and Kirsten in Season 2? A surprise is awaiting Kirsten after a night of passion...with her husband. Read and find out. Kandy 1.
1. A new beginning?

**_(((Hey guys! I know it's been quite a while since the last time i posted a new chapter but you know how it is... _**

**_I've been rewatching the O.C. Season 2 episodes and came up with this idea. _**

**WARNING!!! This story is not what it might seem- if you can't handle it, don't read :)**

**_For the rest of you: I hope you enjoy. I'd love a review... i've planned some other stories like this one but i'm not sure if you would like them ^^ so tell me what you think about this one! (pretty pretty please)))._**

They stumble to the bed, the alcohol in their system making it rather hard to walk straight anyway.

She moans when she feels his hands running all over her- she has missed those hands on her body. She has missed this kind of attention altogether.

When he uses one of his hands to pull her closer by the small of her back and their groins meet, she gasps. _He's missed her too._

Finally hitting the edge of the bed, she feels him lowering her down so his weight is resting on hers while his lips never leave her neck as he places hungry kisses all over it.

She wants him to look at her, make him see the lust and desire in her eyes, but she doesn't want to miss the feeling of his soft lips on her heated skin ever again. And so she tells him.

It has been _so_ long.

She knows that she has missed him emotionally for a very long time now, so long that she has almost forgotten how it would be to hear him say _I love you_, but the physical need for this very man runs deeper than any feeling she has ever felt before.

They have had rough patches in the past, of course they have, they aren't always all over each other like they were when they first met, but the appearance of his ex-girlfriend made things so bad after that disastrous summer that she couldn't even tell you when he last touched or kissed her.

He pulls her out of her thoughts when he bites gently into the flesh just above her breasts. She watches her hands as they run through his messy black hair, before she throws her head back in pleasure as his rushed kisses continue.

"Kirsten" she hears a muffled moan and loves how desperate he's sounding.

Kirsten has wanted to hear this kind of desire in his voice for so long now, that this very moment makes her want him even more. _If that is possible_.

She winds her slim legs around his robe-clad body, pushing their groins once again closely together to get a better feel of him through their clothes.

"Oh God" she cries out when his fingers find their way under her silk top, loving how he doesn't waste time before massaging her breasts.

Kirsten usually prefers when he's slow and gentle and she can feel that special chemistry between them, but since it has been so long, she needs to have him exactly the way he's being now. _Fast. Desperate. Passionate._

She doesn't even complain when he rips her top right off her body. _And it's one of her favourites_.

His hands immediately find their previous place on her upper body and in this moment she wishes she had worn a dress to that stupid wine tasting instead of her white jeans.

Kirsten knows him and therefore doesn't doubt that it wouldn't have taken a second for his talented hands to find their way inside her underwear. _And inside her_.

She finds herself desperately tugging at her own jeans, trying to get the disturbing piece of clothing off her body while his hands and mouth are still concentrated on the upper part of her body.

She mutters under her breath when her alcohol clouded mind wouldn't allow her to open the button. She hears him chuckle lightly at her desperation. His hands quickly join hers and _pop_ it is open. Kirsten lifts her hips, wanting him so much that it physically hurt not to have him closer.

While his head finally leaves her neck and trails sloppy, wet kisses down her collarbone and down between her breasts, she realises for the first time that she hasn't started working on his clothes.

Smiling at the simple white robe that is still covering him, she finds the sash within seconds and pulls at it until it falls open, exposing him completely to her hungry eyes.

She can't help but gasp again- has it been really that long since she last saw him in all his naked glory?

Shaking the thought out of her head, she pulls further at the white robe until it gets flung across the room and knocks down one of the green lamps off the bedside table on its way.

_Green? Aren't the lamps in their bedroom__ white?_

She has probably really had too much for one night! Of course she has an excuse- the wine tasting- but she wonders if he has noticed how drunk she really is.

"I want you" he once again murmurs when his head is on the same level as her belly button.

His hands have long found their new positions on their thighs. Her eyes roll back in desire when it slowly registers in her head what he is about to do.

_His mouth licks. Bites. Sucks. Blows. Kisses._

_His hands caress. Grip. Rub. Scratch. Hold. Massage. _

_She screams. Whispers. Moans. Groans. Grunts. Murmurs. Cries out. B__egs. _For more_._

It's not long before the both of them are left panting, satisfied.

Her world is spinning, partly because of the amount of alcohol, partly because of the mind blowing sex.

His sweaty body collapses on top of hers and she grips him tightly, trying to regain her regular breathing.

Her breasts are pressed against his heaving chest and she can feel how it moves quickly up and down before his breathes slowly even out.

Kirsten realises in that very moment that it was definitely not to late to save her marriage. To forgive him. To forget.

She can't accept it. She doesn't want to.

_She loves him, always has and always will. _

Maybe it was the alcohol. Or the amazing sex. Or simply the fact that she had missed him for so long: But Kirsten now knows that she can't lose her husband. The only man who's ever meant so much to her- the only man who has never broken her heart. Well, _almost never_.

But that would be in _the past_ from now on.

She sighs happily when she listens to his slow, steady breathing. She knows that he's fallen asleep. Kirsten herself feels like she's just had a 65-hours-day even though she only left for the wine tasting a mere few hours ago.

She closes her eyes and lets sleep envelop her in a warm feeling of happiness. Satisfaction. _Love._

And her world goes black.

Kirsten Cohen blinks sleepily when something rouses her from a peaceful slumber at 6:30 in the morning.

She suppresses a yawn whilst rubbing her eyes, trying to regain her orientation. She looks around the room and smiles at the incomparable feeling of a warm body pressed to hers. This was the way she liked to wake up best- wrapped up in the arms of her husband after a night of passionate love-making. Even _if she had been a little bit too drunk for her own good, she would never forget the pleasure he had caused her._

She feels movement behind her, from where he was spooning her small from, and the smile on her face widens.

"You didn't go surfing" she states lightly and starts stroking his left hand which is currently resting on her stomach.

A long silence follows.

She is just about to joke about him being quiet for once when her entire body stiffens. Her fingertips are finding the bare finger on his left hand.

Kirsten feels his breath on her neck and doesn't trust herself to speak, nor to move, nor to protest, when his hands move to turn her around, making her face him.

She almost chokes on her next words, her tears blurring her vision.

_Carter?_

_----------_

**Thank you so much for reading :)**

**JEN.**


	2. I was there YOU weren't

**A/N: **_**Hey guys! Hope you all had a good start in 2010 : ) **_

_**Anyway, I gotta warn you, this might be the weirdest chapter I've EVER written. I didn't even wanna post it but I thought I should get back into it before I can never go back to writing…**_

_**So yeah I donno what made me write this but I just took my laptop, started writing and had to finish it the way I did. I know it's weird and short and doesn't really explain anything, but to me it all makes sense, because when I watched the O.C. (season 2), I always wondered what Kirsten would do without Sandy you know, if it had all gone wrong. Cuz seriously not that I'm happy about that whole "I thought I was losing you"-"that's never gonna happen"-speech, but it wouldn't have been so easy for them to get "back on track" if I had been Josh Schwartz!**_

_**And **__**hey, I might be too naïve and romantic for this world but… I think Kiki would have literally gone crazy . Because in my own little world Sandy is Kirsten's life and the other way around! Lol. **_

_**So read (or don't, cuz this time I wrote this chapter more for me than anything!) and find out what I mean- oh and keep in mind that Kirsten saw Carter as **__**Sandy II.**__** in the first chapter. (And pls don't hate me if you feel like ur wasting ur time with something I actually only wrote to clear my thoughts!)**_

It's not easy to tell who is more shocked about this sudden turn in events. Carter, who must now realise that his dreams of finally having Kirsten to himself had not come true after all, or Kirsten, who now sees someone in bed with her she certainly had not expected.

Carter on one hand shows his hurt by letting a slight frown crease his forehead as his latest lover stumbles around the room in order to find her clothes.

He wants to ask her what all this means, why she hasn't told him earlier that she never meant for last night to ever happen, but instead he keeps quiet. He is afraid his own tears might spill if he hears the beautiful blonde in front of him mutter those words. Those words he is not ready to hear.

_It was a mistake. I didn't want this. You don't mean anything to me. I love my husband._

Even though Carter is well aware of the fact that Kirsten wouldn't declare her unconditional love for him any time soon, he can't help but get out of the bed and disappear into the empty bathroom to cover the disappointment he felt over her actions.

Of course, he tells himself, he probably would have taken advantage of her fragile, and not to mention drunken, state as well if he had known about her reaction in the morning earlier, but now, having seen the tears in her eyes, the hurt he had unintentionally caused, he wishes he had never gone to that wine-tasting in the first place.

Because if you haven't tasted the wine, you don't know how good it really is. And you have to live speculating. You can't get disappointed. And the _wine_ you desire doesn't lose an ounce of its perfection, because it all stays in your head.

Because now he sees that he won't have the chance to get back what they used to have.

Because it has all gone wrong and he can't fix this.

Kirsten on the other hand doesn't spend a minute longer in the hotel than she has to. Once she has found most of her clothes and has wiped away the tears that came the second she realised what she had done, she left the room.

Without returning to get the small suitcase she'd brought along for the weekend. Without returning to check out properly and make sure Carter wouldn't be standing alone in the hotel. Without returning. Or _turning_ back. At all.

She sees the cab pulling into the lot and she wonders how long she's waited for it. Knowing she could call Julie, Seth or Ryan, even her dad to come pick her up anytime, Kirsten wonders for a second why she didn't. But before long, the shock that has made her work on auto-pilot- grabbing her clothes and even making sure her ripped top was covered by a jacket, redressing, calling the cab, sitting down on a bench with the sharp edges of her cell cutting into her sweaty fingers- disappears and reality comes back.

And with it all the things she doesn't even want to start thinking about, come flowing back into her consciousness.

She can't think about them, though. Because thinking, or god forbid talking, about things make them all become real, right? So right now, as long as she stays mute and thoughtless nothing has happened.

Kirsten watches the driver getting out the vehicle before she takes a deep breath, wraps the strap of her handbag tightly around her arm and tells herself that _nothing happened_. Because _nothing could ever happen_. Not to her.

She is Kirsten Cohen. Daughter of Caleb and Rose Nichol. Sister to Hailey Nichol. Mother and guardian to Seth Ezikiel Cohen and Ryan Atwood. _Wife to…_

Julie Cooper Nichol's friend and stepdaughter. Ex-girlfriend of James Cooper.

Leading member of the organisation for charity events in Newport. Driven businesswoman.

She is _Kirsten._

And so just like that, nothing happened.

Kirsten climbs into the car and from then on the only words that are exchanged between driver and client are her address and the price.

She looks outside the window, thinks about everything and nothing. Everything apart from _what didn't happen_ in the hotel room.

The only tears she sheds that day are the ones she's left in that hotel room. Where _nobody_ is still waiting. And where _nothing_ has ever happened.

She is proud of herself when she finds herself alone at home and doesn't cry. She stands up straight and tells herself that this can work. That she isn't disappointed and hurt and torn apart on the inside because she finds herself alone in the empty hallway of her own house. That her boys aren't there to distract her. That S…. that nobody is there to keep her company. That it's okay _that nothing_ happened yesterday and that she has to live with that from now on. That she can keep lying to herself because, let's be honest, denial has always been her favourite coping mechanism.

That she can look _her life_ in the eyes and tell him how much she loves him and that this is the only reason why she is home already.

At the thought of her husband's blue eyes looking back at her, Questioning, Disappointed, Hurt, Without that look in them that told her he loved her more than words could ever say, That they could get through anything, an unexpected sob pierces through the lifeless house.

Her new friend is already awaiting her impatiently in the fridge.

1 5 d a y s l a t e r .

"_Don't_ you tell me I was cheating on you with another man. _You weren't there_!" she screams at him, almost falling over as the amount of alcohol she has had makes her knees shake.

"Tell me how the hell I could have been there. Tell me why you seem to be going _crazy_. Tell me why my wife has turned into an alcoholic within days. It was _you_ who told me about this, so don't make it seem like I'm making up stories here, Kirsten!" Sandy said, more confused than anything.

"I told you I was having sex when I was away on that weekend 2 weeks ago, yes" she states now as if she tells him what she's bought while she was grocery shopping, her tone completely calm.

He is silent, not knowing if he is more worried about her state of mind, his failing marriage or where she is going with his. Again. She's tried to tell him countless times what has been burning her insides with guilt ever since she came back from the wine-tasting. When she isn't passed out from drinking, that is.

"So now you are telling me that, what you did" he paused, trying to breathe evenly once more "that what you did can't be called _cheating_, because, because you weren't screwing some other man" pause " because instead you were just _having sex_ that didn't include me"

He is at a loss for words after his last and desperate attempt to understand her. He wonders if somewhere inside that broken woman is _his_ Kirsten. And that all this is a really sick joke. That what she's tried to tell him ever since she's come back, isn't what he thinks it is. That she had cheated on him with another man. In his mind he already knows who it must have been if she had done what he prayed never happened.

But every time he'd tried to make sense of her words, she kept giving him nonsense. She spoke in riddles, talking about things he simply didn't understand anymore.

"_I cheated on you"._ 2 minutes later _"Don't tell me I cheated. How can you think that?"/ _ _"I slept with another man"._ _"Don't tell me I would sleep with someone else_".

"Yes. **It's all your fault**, you know"

Kirsten says and her tone has changed once again. She is almost whispering now. Those few words make her sound almost sober once again and Sandy wonders if she is finally going to come back to him, to earth, and tell him what the hell is happening to the woman he married 20 years ago.

After a long pause that makes her eyes well up with tears she looks him straight in the eyes.

"You and I. _**We**_ were making love. In that hotel. And it was good and _you_ made me feel so… alive. So loved and _I had you back_ and then… you were gone **and he was there because you're not**. Because you're never there anymore, Sandy. You get it? I was there. But You weren't. **I was loving YOU, but you didn't love me back.** Because you don't love me back anymore, Sandy"

Her confusing ramble is the last thing Sandy's mind registers as she turns to walk away on weak legs. She enters the closet, shuts the door.

_Click__. _And the door is locked, cutting off the rest of the world from the dark walk-in-closet that has become Kirsten's home during the last fifteen days.

**Confused? Yeah me, too! Lol. SO yeah don't be mad at me, I hope you don't feel like you totally wasted a few minutes of your time. If you would like to know more because my ramble at the start didn't help you at all, leave me a review or send me a private message ; )**

**Ps: Sorry for my bad English! It's kinda late over here right now!**


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